A New Perspective
The Change is in Me
Have you had the experience where you are going about your day-to-day business and someone says something so matter-of-factly, but it’s such a new and profound statement that you can’t believe you’ve lived this much of your life without that viewpoint? Or sometimes it can be the reverse, someone’s statement can totally derail a long-held belief and bam the wind is knocked out of you and thus begins the work of understanding how one little statement could have such a huge impact and bother you so much.
I’ve experienced both sides of this situation so now I seek out new perspectives, intentionally. Especially when I find that I am feeling very comfortable and superior in my particular belief system.
But I am still caught off guard and now I learn to embrace it.
Story of My Life
I am soft-spoken but often speak loudly, gruffly, and intensely at work when I want my point to sink. Actually, I do this in all areas of my life when I feel like I am not being heard or listened too and I inevitably lose my voice. Every freaking time.(Spiritual guru’s would say I am using too much masculine energy – which is true but that’s not the point of this blog post, so I’ll save that for another day.)
One weekend I was able to spend the entire 48 hours outside: I backpacked with two family-members I respect and love. My brother was on the trip and is also soft-spoken and he made the off-hand comment when we couldn’t hear him on the trail over the crunch of the leaves and rush of the river, that he knows “I am soft-spoken and I don’t care whether people hear me or not.”
BAM. Profound freaking statement. Knowing my brother it had occurred to me in the past that he simply didn’t care if people heard him or not, he wasn’t going to strain to get him point across. In my mind he showed a faith and trust that if what he said needed to be heard, it would be.
Awe and there is the gift in that perspective. I spend all my time straining my physical voice to be heard only to repeat myself numerous times, most commonly in the professional setting. It infuriates me. No. One. Listens.
The Universe Provides…Lessons
While that statement has probably changed the course of my relationships, the universe is making sure, really wants to hone in the point of this statement, so…. I lost my voice on my way home from that backpacking trip. Completely.
As I’ve become more aware and practiced paying attention to the lessons presented to me, I see the loss of my voice as an opportunity to experiment. I promised myself I would not strain my voice to be heard as I headed into work the following day. I communicated at barely a whisper for the entire day and you know what? People still didn’t listen completely, still didn’t clear their minds enough to remember the “really important” thing I whispered and wanted them to “hear”. Though I did have one scenario where my whispers were met with utter and total silence because well, you have to be quiet to hear what I was saying. And the most important thing I had to communicate that day was that I needed help. When I communicated that quietly, calmly, and sincerely, I was listened too and was provided the help I needed and wanted so desperately.
The change isn’t in the people I work with or spend time with on a regular basis, the change is in me. I am no longer going to be strain to be heard. What the lesson about taught me is that if I am meant to be heard, I will be. Otherwise, I am losing the attachment of making sure that everyone hears what I say.
What can your change be? What profound and new perspective changed the trajectory in your life?